sushi and smiles

i got off work feeling sorry for myself. rather, i was feeling sorry about myself. sometimes i regret the way i respond to people who obviously care about me. i was worried that i'd been too nonsensical for him to call. so i took myself out. to the sushi place downtown. you ever have the feeling that you need to know you are worthwhile, even though you don't know that is what you are feeling until a stranger shows you that you are? that is exactly where i was when i walked through the doors. i sat down at the sushi bar and ordered myself a feast of edamame, salmon and tuna sushi, and a salmon-ginger roll. and then the affirmations just started rolling in. first the sushi chef offered me kaiso salad with a wink, "just because. eat! eat!" and then the waitress called me her "little lady" in broken english and offered me a free helping of miso soup. and then. as if the japanese lovin' wasn't enough. a father/son duo, tranplants from L.A. (and a handsome duo at that) offered me a shot of sake and a compliment, "you look like the perfect sushi partner. why are you here alone? come! take a drink with us, we have plenty!" "kampai!" we all shouted as the waitress took a shot with us too and all was well in my world. the chef talked to me quite a bit. he hopes to retire soon, as he has been in the restuarant business for many years, his last establishment being this one here in sonora. he asked me many questions and what is more, is that i could tell he was genuinely interested in my answers. we had trouble understanding eachother through our foreign pronunciations, but we talked as clearly and as simply as possible to one another and we looked at eacother with care. a sweet old man. he told me to come back often and that he would make me anything i wanted "to suit your tastes." the sake boys left and said they hoped to see me over sushi again soon. i slowly finished what i could and boxed up the rest. i left with red cheeks, feeling much better than i had only a couple of hours before.

and he called. i helped him make pasta over the phone. and we laughed. about the sugar he spilled all over the counter while trying to make iced tea. about his dog growling at him for attention in the background. and yes about how nonsensical i can be. but he said it was cute. and that he'd call again soon.

all sushi and smiles here in california.